Everything that we do in the presence of others has an influence on them. How can you have more of an influence? How can you talk to their inner self, their subconscious mind? Hypnotherapists do this by putting their clients in a trance, but it’s not really necessary to do that. Last week, I wrote about how to talk to your (inner) self to overcome problems and perhaps make yourself more confident. How can you talk to the inner self of others and have influence?
Last week I wrote about evidence. There is empirical evidence, that which we can observe and we find that reliable. There is also anecdotal evidence, hearsay evidence that is less reliable, but we still listen to it and often believe it.
To influence others we have to offer evidence. It can be empirical or anecdotal, but we have to offer evidence in order to be influential. If I told you that I had looked at a new television in a store and it looked good. The salesman said it’s the latest technology and that everyone will own one like it soon. Would you be convinced? Now compare that with a different scenario, that is not so anecdotal. I tell you about the television, but not what someone else has said. I tell you that I bought the television and how good it is. That would be far more convincing and believable. However, even more believable would be for you to observe for yourself. I could show you the new television, as well as talking about it. This is effectively, a demonstration. If we demonstrate that something is true to people, then they are far more likely to believe it.
We have to rely on anecdotal evidence, if we can’t demonstrate the message, we are trying to purvey. We have to be convincing and so our message has to be plausible. Do we shout our message from the rooftops or do we subtly whisper our message? A subtle message tends to be subliminal, it is appreciated by the inner-self, the subconscious mind. If the message pertains in some way to the survival of the recipient, or even to collective survival, then it’s more likely to be accepted as true. We try to avoid sickness and injury, we try to be social and have a desire to be accepted. We are social animals and this desire is exploited by social media. The internet buzzes with information exchanged through Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn. We can’t believe everything that we see and read via social media, but we tend to believe what we see and hear; if it plausible.
Look at some of the subtle messages, that we see every day. Look at the car in my picture, the makers badge is quite subtle, but instantly recognised by any car enthusiast. Subtle labels and details on cars and clothing makes them desirable. They tend to project a certain image, that influences the beliefs of the observer. What would you think if you saw someone dressed in a designer suit, wearing a Rolex and stepping out of a Ferrari? You might be positively influenced or negatively influenced; but you would be influenced. What you wear creates an image, it can be good or bad. I bought clothes yesterday in an attempt at a smart casual look. I’m quite tall and so can appear intimidating to some people. Formal dress can also be intimidating and so I wanted something smart, but casual. Of course some people do dress to intimidate, so called power dressing.
If you want your influence to be subliminal, then the items of dress that are hardly noticeable are the most effective. Aspects of your behaviour that you might not be aware of, will have a powerful influence on others. Drink a little too much alcohol at a business lunch and it could subconsciously have a devastating effect on your reputation. Even the way your clothes feel to the touch influences people. Fabrics that look soft to the touch, make you appear more empathic. The crisp clean cotton of a nurse’s uniform says not only cleanliness, but also efficiency.
Everything we do says something about us and sends out a message. Be aware of the messages that you send out. When you speak, think first and make what you say plausible. Honesty is the most plausible way of communicating with others and the most credible.
There are more amazing blogs on the home page. Finally, be careful of what you write and the way you write it. Even your choice of font will have a subliminal affect.